ye olde facebook statuses

Gleaned from the last month or two of facebook statuses:

Theia, while laughing and pointing at the mohawked little boy in front of us: "Look Mama, his hair is up like a chicken!"

"What color are his shoes?!!" asks Eliza enthusiastically, as she comes bounding up to the door to size up the pizza delivery guy.

Eliza, while leaning over the pier: "You can't let me fall in, cause then you wouldn't have a me."

Theia's substitutions when she can't think of the right word or phrase crack me up. Yesterday "Ring the doorbell" was "ding-a-ling the jingle bell." Close enough, right?

Eliza's "What do you think you're doing in this world?!" sounded rather rude, until Theia translated for me. "No, Eliza. You mean 'What in the world do you think you're doing'" (spoken with extreme condescension).

Eliza: "Hey Mommy, I had a nice nap!" "Oh, good." "And, I have big poopy in my diaper!" ........"oh.".......

Theia, while playing with Jessie's toy gun: "Um, excuse me ma'am, do you mind if I shoot that giant?" I don't think she spends enough time playing with boys.

I wonder lately if Ingrid has been slapping on purpose, so she can practice her newly learned skill of saying "sorry", and giving reconciliatory hugs. She seems to enjoy it a little too much.

Theia to Jessie at the gas station: "Daddy! You're a good gasser Daddy!

I've been thinking about the helpfulness of children who so willingly take your dirty dishrags to the laundry room for you... and deposit them in the dryer with a load of clean whites.

I have come to the conclusion that finishing a cup of coffe (or even a quarter of a cup) while its still warm is just something that does not happen to parents of toddlers.

I am hearing a lot of splashing and high-pitched giggles from the bathroom. Kinda scared to walk in there. (Updated) Just did, and was greeted immediately with "Mommy, can you please get out?" by Eliza.

Eliza does not want me to come outside with her, bacause I might "get all sweaty". God forbid.

It was actually feeling pretty good when Theia was brushing my hair, until I heard Jessie tell her to go put the upholstery attachment back on the vacuum cleaner.

"Eliza, I'm sorry you can't get on my lap now. Mama doesn't feel good" "But Mamaaa, I thought you were my best frieeeeend!"

I think my two year old just told me to grow up. "Mommy, don't act like a girl, act like a Mommy!"

I am not a fan of Eliza's latest trick of walking away with her head and shoulders down, hands hanging down to her knees, after she is reprimanded.

Eliza: "What happened to your arm?" Me: "I got a nasty bruise when I pinched it in the closet door." Eliza: "Oh, that's too bad. Can I smell it?" (????!)

Theia: "We would never want Mama's heart to break, so that's why we can't stick things in the outlets."

Theia: "Did I ever see a seacock?" Me: "You mean peacock." Theia: "Oh, you mean pee like some people say they go pee in the toilet instead of potty?"

Naptime conversation: Me: "Lets pray for Daddy because he's sick." Eliza: "Oh. Did he get bit by a dragon?"

I guess I should be glad that Theia is learning to listen more closely and correct her speech on her own, but I miss hearing her sing "When we all get to heaven/ what a day of rejoicing that will be/ when we a-a-a-lll see Jesus/ we'll sing and shout, Oh Rick, Oh Reeeee!"

I am cracking up at Ingrid's method of turning down food that is offered to her. She puts her finger in her mouth and squeezes her eyes shut, as if she's trying to make it disappear.

Eliza: "Do you have a funny face on your head?" I guess I must.

Our two year old has an obsession with coffee. Saints preserve us if she ever actually gets her hands on any.

There's nothing like having your 17 month old christen your new toothbrush before you even get it through the checkout line.

Jessie and I are now addressed as Moddy and Damma, respectively, by their two year old. Wouldn't mind it so much if "Damma" didn't so much like "Grandma".

Theia: "Mommy, is it ok if I make a huge mess in my room?" Gotta love those questions with easy built-in answers.

Well, Theia just summed up the rest of my life for me: "When you get old, you will get wrinkles on your face, and I will get a baby, and you can be my baby's grandma."

Our life now plays to a Disney soundtrack, since the girls figured out how to push "play" on the cd player.

We are still smiling at Theia's explanation for Ingrid's crabbiness: "She's sad because she isn't a butterfly."